Saturday 30 April 2011

Forget About Studying Relationship Psychology

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If you are having trouble in your relationship and you and your partner just don't seem to be getting on very well lately then you may find yourself studying relationship psychology trying to work out what has gone wrong. You could end up driving yourself crazy in your attempt to find out what the problem is and there are better options that will benefit you more.

There are so many different books available about relationship psychology and they will all tell you something different, so how do you know which one is giving you the correct information? You really don't know who is giving you good information and the information that you need may also depend on your situation. Relationships can become trouble for various reasons so no one piece of advice will cover all relationship problems. There is a lot of theory behind relationships and different behaviors but whether those theories can help you is another story. Even trained counselors and relationship experts will often give the same advice to different couples when these different couples actually require different advice depending on their particular problems.

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There are just so many different reasons why relationships have problems. Some couples will argue a lot over money, child raising opinions, sex or other reasons. Even when couples have similar problems, the way that people deal with those problems can vary quite a bit.

This doesn't mean that you can't find help to improve your relationship; you just don't need to study relationship psychology to get help. There is a great book available called 'The Magic of Making Up' that gives a lot of advice and much of what is discussed in this book can help with various relationship problems. It is a great self help course that will teach you to communicate better with your partner which can drastically increase the chance of improving your relationship.

Not all relationships can be saved and whether your relationship is salvageable or not may depend on the problems that have led to the current state. If a relationship is salvageable then this is the book that can help you save it. This book will help you to make that decision on whether it is worth saving your relationship and if so how to do it.

Too many couples will continue along in an unhappy relationship being in denial and not wanting to admit there is anything wrong. The longer a couple continues this way the bigger the problems will become. If there are problems in the relationship they won't disappear on their own, they need to be dealt with so you can move on and be happy together.

If you love your partner and want to save your relationship then forget about studying relationship psychology and focus on saving the relationship and making each other happy again.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Friday 29 April 2011

Is There A Right Time To End A Relationship

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If you are in a relationship that is having trouble you may find yourself wondering if there is a right time to end a relationship. Just how do you know when to make that decision that there is no future for you and your partner? If you have spent months or even years with this person it can be a very difficult decision to end that relationship.

Some people will find that they still love their partner but they know deep down that the relationship is going nowhere and they don't have a future together. But when you still love a person you don't want to let that relationship go. You will consider all the options including staying with the person hoping that your love will be enough to save the relationship.

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There are other couples who think that their relationship is too difficult and just give up without really thinking it through and discovering whether there is a future or not. The problem with this is that often these couples are meant to be together and if they work at improving their relationship they could have a happy future together.

Then there are the people who are in a terrible relationship but they stay together and keep on trying to make it work. Their friends and family tell them they are wasting their time and they should break up but they continue in their failing relationship. Even when infidelity is involved, they stay together in the hope that the cheating partner won't do it again and everything will work out. In this scenario it is usually best to end the relationship but they just can't seem to make that decision and this is often because they are more scared of being alone than they are of staying in the relationship.

It can be very difficult to know when to end a relationship and you don't want to rush into making such a big decision. There are situations where it should be obvious such as an abusive relationship, but even in these cases many people still stay in the relationship. There is no excuse for abuse and if you are being abused then you should make that decision immediately to end the relationship. There are no second chances and there is no point telling yourself that it will get better because it rarely does in this type of situation.

If you're partner has cheated on you then it can be difficult to make the decision to leave. If he has only cheated once there is a good chance it may never happen again and you can work through it. If he has been cheating for a long time or has cheated on more than one occasion then it isn't likely that he'll change and you really should consider moving on.

There is no easy way to know the right time to end a relationship and it will all depend on each individual situation. Sometimes it is helpful to take a break for a couple of days on your own so you can clear your head and have a good think about the situation. Take a good look at the relationship and what has been happening and then decide whether this is the person you really want to spend the rest of your life with. Then you can decide whether the relationship is worth saving or whether you should end it now.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

What Is The Secret To Relationships-Common Sense

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I'm sure if there were secrets to relationships someone would be making millions of dollars selling that secret. Although there is no secret as such there are many things that you can do to help keep your relationship strong and happy. Relationship secrets are really just common sense but they are things that over time we forget to do.

1. Love. Obviously a relationship needs love to survive and being in love is not enough if your partner doesn't know that you love them. You need to show each other that you love one another and you need to feel comfortable telling your partner that you love them.

2. Secondly you need to have respect in your relationship. If you don't respect one another then there really isn't much hope for a long and happy relationship. There is no point to being with someone that you don't respect and no point being with someone that doesn't respect you.

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3. Always treat your partner with kindness. I'm sure you don't like it when people are nasty to you and your partner also wouldn't like it if they are treated nastily. Sometimes we take one another for granted and can be sarcastic and a bit nasty without meaning to be. We often treat strangers more kindly than we treat family so make a point to be kind to your partner.

4. Be thoughtful of your partners needs and do little things now and then to make him happy. It is amazing how much small gestures can make someone happy and improve a relationship.

5. Always be honest in a relationship. You cannot build a relationship on lies or when the truth does come out everything will fall apart. Always be honest and build your relationship on honesty and trust.

Although these are not secrets they are important to a relationship and they are what relationships need to survive and be happy. When you haven't been doing these things it can be difficult to get back into the habit of them but it is worth putting in that effort.

These are not hard things to do and they are things that you should do with someone that you love. Kindness, honesty and respect will go a long way to making a relationship happy and strong.

There is more to a relationship than just existing with one another. You need to show each other that you love one another and this can be done with simple little expressions of love such as giving him a hug when he gets home from work or cooking his favorite meal and eating it by candlelight.

Sometimes relationships can take a bit of work to make them strong and happy but over time these things will become natural and you will both be much happier with one another. If you can do these small, common sense things then you have found the secret to relationships.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Thursday 28 April 2011

Do You Wonder Why Women Leave Men

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If you are getting worried about your relationship and have concerns that your girlfriend or wife is going to leave you then you may be wondering what some of the reasons are that women leave men. There is no one reason that suits all situations, there are a number of different reasons why women leave men.

In a relationship there can sometimes be little things that one person might not like but they have tolerated it for a while. But after a while that little thing becomes really annoying and they don't want to tolerate it anymore. Then every time this thing happens they can get angry and that little thing can seem like one big annoying thing.

Then there are other little frustrations and hurts that can occur and even though they may be small little incidents, they can add up over time. When little frustrations build up over time they can end up being one big frustration and at some point the woman will have had enough and will just leave. It is important to know the warning signs of trouble in a relationship so that your relationship doesn't reach that point.

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If you think you know what women want you may need to think again. Many men have the wrong idea of what women want, they think they are needy and high maintenance and this is usually completely wrong. You should stop thinking of your wife or girlfriend as a woman but instead think of her as a person. Treat her the same way that you like to be treated, the same way that all people like to be treated.

Some men will put their woman on a pedestal and treat her like a porcelain doll and worship her. Some men will treat their woman like a whore or even like a surrogate mother. Neither of these approaches is good for a relationship, you should treat a woman like a human being, like an equal, like an individual who wants to be treated with respect.

You also need to understand that all women are different so don't expect your wife or girlfriend to act a certain way or like certain things just because your last girlfriend did or because your mother does. You need to treat the woman as an individual because that's exactly what she is, she will have her own likes and dislikes and will act the way she acts.

When a woman leaves a man it is often because she is unsatisfied in some way. She may not be getting her needs met, she may not be treated with respect; she may want more from the relationship.

Your wife or girlfriend should be your best friend. You should talk to her like you would talk to your best friend, treat her like she's important and treat her with respect. Show her affection and know that you are still attracted to her even after all this time.

If you are asking yourself why women leave men, well it could be for any number of reasons, but generally because they are not being treated with the respect they deserve.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Tuesday 26 April 2011

Is Your Marriage In Crisis- Are There Warning Signs

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Is your marriage in crisis or are you perhaps deluding yourself that it isn't? Quite often one party in a marriage may not be happy while the other is oblivious to their partner's unhappiness and thinks that their marriage is going fine. A marriage in crisis may sometimes just look like a boring marriage that may have lost it spark and a couple may not do anything about it until it's too late.

If you want your marriage to last then you need to be aware of the warning signs that your marriage may be in crisis. Don't just accept that your marriage is boring but its ok, if you feel that you have lost your spark then this is the time to do something about it. Your sex life is probably the first thing that you should look at and although this isn't the most important aspect of a relationship it is a crucial part of a healthy marriage.

Do you struggle to remember when you last had sex because it was so long ago? Does having sex seem like a chore to either party? Has the spontaneity disappeared from your sex life? You can usually spot a marriage in crisis by looking at their sex life!

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If sex has become a chore in your marriage that doesn't mean the marriage is over, there is still a chance to save it. Most marriages will go through a stage of not having a great sex life, often after they have children. With each child that is born it becomes harder to keep the sex life active with kids running around and the Mom not having any energy left over for her husband.

Most marriages will get through this stage and will find their spark again but not all do. A marriage is in trouble if it can't get past this stake and never breaks out of that pattern. When a couple cease to show each other any physical affection, then this could be a sign that the marriage is in trouble. If a couple are happily in love they do tend to show some physical affection toward one another so if this has stopped then you need to take action to get that spark back before it's too late.

If you take a look at your marriage, do you and your partner show each other affection? Do you ever walk over and give your wife a hug for no reason? Do you tell her how lovely she looks? Do you give her a kiss on the cheek for no reason? If the answer is no, then maybe it's time you started doing some of these things.

If you feel that you don't really need to do these things then you are probably deluding yourself. When you don't show each other affection you are really taking each other for granted and the next step on from that is resentment.

If you notice that the spark has disappeared from your marriage, the good news is that you have recognized the warning signs on time and can do something about it.

Make a point of showing your wife affection by telling her she looks lovely today or giving her a hug for no reason. You will be really surprised to find that she will enjoy this and will most likely respond by showing you more affection. Don't wait until your marriage is in crisis before you do anything about it, start putting the spark back into your relationship now.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

How To Get Love Back Just Think It Through

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Have you broken up from a relationship and wondering how to get love back? Being in love is such an amazing feeling but it can be absolutely devastating if that love ends. The ending of a relationship can be the worst feeling in the world.

If you find yourself in this situation and want to know what you can do to make amends and get love back then why not try the following steps.

Firstly you need to have a really good think about the relationship and work out if it is definitely over. Is it possible that you are 'just taking a break' or is it really over for good? Some couples do decide to take a break and spend some time apart with the possibility of getting back together and making it work. Others do break up with the intention of not getting back together but over time realize they were wrong and they get back together again. Then there are those relationships that are just not meant to work and those relationships are not worth trying to save.

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If you think that your relationship is one that is worth saving and your ex is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with then you can take steps to try and work things out. If you hurt your ex in any way then you need to make it clear that you are sorry for what you did. If you have changed as a person and she doesn't love that new person then you may need to consider going back to the person you once were - the person she fell in love with.

You shouldn't rush her into coming back to you, if she is hurt or angry then she might need some time to herself to think things through and workout what she wants to do with this relationship. Remember that you cannot force someone to love you and if she just doesn't love you anymore then it may be time to move on.

When you are trying to get love back, don't appear desperate as this will be a big turn off for your ex. You need to act mature and show her that you have changed and that you are prepared to do whatever it takes to make the relationship work. Don't go calling her every five minutes or sending her hundreds of text messages. Give her the space that she needs right now to calm down and think things through.

After a week or so then give her a call and perhaps ask her to meet you to talk things through. Don't beg her to come back to you, but just apologize again for hurting her and let her know that you still love her. Tell her that you really want the relationship to work and that you want to talk things through and work on the problems within the relationship. An apology on its own is not enough to convince a woman that you have changed and that you will really put an effort into the relationship, you need to talk to her, listen to what she says and show her that you care about her feelings and opinions and want to work together to build this relationship.

Getting over love can be very difficult but remember that if she really doesn't want to get back with you then you need to accept that and move on. However, if you can sit and talk to her maturely and she decides that she does still love you and would like to give it another go, then don't go straight back to what you were doing before you broke up, you need to change and remember everything she talked about and really make an effort to make it work.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Monday 25 April 2011

Lost Love And How To Deal With It

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You can be on top of the world when you are in love and then feel like a sinking ship when it ends. If you have lost love and have found yourself alone then you may be struggling to deal with it. When I lost love I told myself to put it down to experience and you can learn from your experiences. By using your lost love to learn from you can then move on with your life with a much better understanding of love.

I remember one love in my life that I thought was 'the one'. He broke my heart and I thought I would never get over it, I believed that we were meant to be together and that there had to be some way to get him back. I didn't think I would ever fall in love again and really didn't want to; all I could think about was this one lost love.

That is when someone said to me 'put it all down to experience' and I took that on board and kept reminding myself of that. I would remind myself that this relationship had just been part of my life experience in the incredible journey of life. It was an experience that I had to have to move on and become the better person that I am today. It was because of this lost love and how I used it to learn from that I was able to move on and find a much better and stronger love.

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You will find happiness again after losing love but it may take some time to get there. A broken heart doesn't heal overnight and those memories will remain in your mind for a long time. But as time passes they become more distant and you will begin to forget your ex and that love you felt for him. He may always have a special place in your heart, but make that special place one that you accept as being in the past so you can move on and give your heart to someone else.

You can think back and analyse your relationship and see what went wrong. Did you do something wrong? Were you too possessive? Were you too clingy? Didn't you trust him? Did you flirt with other guys? There can be a number of reasons why a relationship ends and they may or may not be due to something you did. Sometimes people just fall out of love.

If you do find that there was something you may have done to cause the relationship to end, then this is your opportunity to learn from that and avoid it happening again in the future. If you were possessive and didn't trust him then this is something you could work on to improve your own self confidence and learn to trust.

No matter how heartbreaking it is when a relationship ends, you will get over it at some point and you can walk away from the relationship with some good memories. You can also walk away from the relationship with new skills that you can learn and grow from and a whole new attitude to life.

Any negative circumstance in life can be used to learn from and then start again with a new, more positive approach. Try to see the positive aspect of any situation, even though that might seem difficult at first, and you can grow from the experience.

Lost love is heartbreaking, but learn from it and grow and you will find love again, a much stronger love and you will be much happier.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

I Just Want Him To Love Me Again

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Women all over the world feel unloved and just want their man to love them again. When a relationship loses it spark and there is no intimacy left then a woman is often left saying to her close friends 'I want him to love me again'.

Some women may be on the bad end of a divorce or breakup but just can't seem to get over their ex and think of nothing else but wanting to get back that man and his love. Some women may be the instigator of the divorce or breakup due to a lack of intimacy in the relationship, but later feel they have made a mistake and hope that there is some chance of rekindling the relationship. There are women worldwide facing similar situations and the one thing that they have in common is that they all want that love back.

If you are in a position where you want to win back the love of your man you need to look at the relationship you had and wonder if there was anything missing in that relationship. What do men need? Men need attention and they like to know that you still find them attractive and that you admire him.

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While you may know that you love him, admire him and want him, it might not be so obvious to him so it doesn't hurt to tell him now and then how much you love him. Don't just tell him but show him that you love him, flirt with him a little and bring back the spark into the relationship. When a relationship goes on a woman will put less effort into the relationship, and so do men to some degree. A woman may start to dress more casually and just wear sweats around the house and forget about wearing make-up or sexy clothes, but men still like to see you looking nice. Just because they live with you doesn't mean they don't want to see you looking good.

Did your husband or boyfriend leave you for another woman? Or do you lack trust in him and have convinced yourself that he has been seeing another woman? Women can sometimes become a little paranoid about their men looking at other women and then perhaps taking that even further. A woman always think that if their man has left them for another woman that it would be a beautiful woman when that isn't always the case. If their ex is dating an average looking woman then the wife will wonder what he sees in her. You should know that looks are not what your man is looking for, but it is respect and admiration that he wants from a woman.

When you are your ex were together did you nag him all the time? Was he always complaining about your nagging? Is it possible that you nagged him because you weren't happy with him the way he was? A man wants his woman to be satisfied with him for who he is, not for who she wants him to be. If you were constantly nagging him then he most likely felt that you weren't happy with him the way he is.

All relationships move past the initial honeymoon stage where admiration and flirting are constant, but unfortunately some of them lose the spark completely. You don't need to get back to that honeymoon stage because no relationship can stay at that stage forever, but there needs to be a happy medium. If you love your man and are proud of him and respect him then you need to let him know. You need to show him your love so he doesn't feel like you take him for granted.

If you have been saying to yourself "I want him to love me again" then consider what might have gone wrong in your relationship and what you can do to make it right again.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Friday 22 April 2011

How To Handle A Boyfriend Break Up

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Have you broken up from your boyfriend? Do you feel like you just can't go on without him? Are you wondering if there is anything that you can do to get him back?

If you are wondering if you can get your boyfriend back then you need to look closely at your life and the relationship you had and decide whether that is really what you want. Perhaps it is the thought of a relationship that you want rather than the guy himself. Perhaps you do love him but maybe he just isn't good for you. There really is a lot to consider before you go jumping into trying to get him back.

If you do decide that you do want him back then there are steps that you can take to work toward that goal. However, if you decide that it is probably best for you to be apart then there are steps that you can take to help you move on. You need to reach some sort of closure so that you can really recognize that the relationship is over, when you find closure then you can begin to heal.

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Don't keep all your emotions bottled up or you will continue to hurt and find it more difficult to get over him. You can get your emotions out by doing the following:

* See a counselor or therapist so you can talk about your emotions, talk about the relationship and they can help you to move on. With a counselor you can talk about things that you might not feel comfortable talking about to your family or friends. A third party isn't as personal so it is often easier to talk about things.

* Talk to friends and family and get your feelings out in the open. If your friends or family just tell you to get over it and don't want to listen to you, then find someone else to talk to. You want a good friend that will be empathetic, supportive and help you work through your feelings.

* Start a journal and write your feelings down. Even though writing your feelings isn't talking, it is still getting them out and giving you a way to release them. Poetry is often good too if you enjoy poetry then put your feelings in to a poem.

Next you want to get rid of anything around the house that will remind you of your ex and especially get rid of things that belong to him. Return all his belongings to him and anything he doesn't want just throw away. If he has given you gifts that you can't bear to throw away then put them in a box and store them away somewhere where you won't see them every day.

Then you need to make some plans to go out, perhaps you can go out with your friends. You don't want to spend too much time at home alone or you will just sit and think about your ex. It is best to go out and enjoy yourself. This is the opportunity to do the things you really love but perhaps didn't do too often because your ex didn't enjoy them. This is your opportunity to get to know the real you and enjoy yourself doing whatever you want to do.

Do whatever makes you happy. Make some lifestyle changes - a change is as good as a holiday so they say. Start a healthy diet, go to the gym and exercise regularly. Start to feel really good about yourself so you can be happy with whom you are as an individual and not as part of a couple.

By getting out and enjoying yourself and doing the things that make you happy you fill find that you begin to miss your ex less and less. You will become much happier as a person and will grow in self esteem and self confidence.

You don't need to rush in to a new relationship, you will know when the time is right and perhaps it might happen when you least expect it. If you begin to have feelings toward someone else then you will know that you are well and truly over your ex. Then your boyfriend break up will be a thing of the past as you are moving on with your future.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Thursday 21 April 2011

Is It Possible To Save A Marriage- Even The Best Have Problems

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Many of the religions around the world view marriage as a sacred institution that is the foundation of the family. It is extremely important in these religions to make every effort possible to save a marriage when it seems to be in trouble.

Even the best of marriages will have their bad moments and these days there does seem to be more divorce than there once was many years ago. The roles of men and women have changed considerably over the years, there seems to be much more financial pressures these days and children seem to have more behavioral issues than in the past. These all put pressure on a marriage and some will struggle to get through it.

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So what do you do if your marriage is in trouble?

The church is one good place to start if your marriage needs help, after all the church does value the sanctity of marriage very highly.

Sure there are family therapists, marriage counselors or clinical psychologists that you can visit but most of these will take on an individualistic approach to the counseling. A pastor or church counselor on the other hand will take a more wholistic approach which will have a much better chance of success.

Is there an advantage to seeing a pastoral counselor rather than a secular therapist?

A secular therapist has been educated in their field but their education is almost solely on treating individuals. Even those therapists who specialize in marriage and family therapy have only had perhaps on class or elective in how to deal with couple's therapy. Because of their lack of education for a family as a whole this approach is not always the best.

On the other hand, a pastoral counselor is educated with the aim of helping couple’s work through their problems and brings them closer together. A pastor has the belief that once the vows of marriage are taken the marriage should be forever, with the exception of an abusive relationship.

Many pastoral counselors have undergone formal education for counseling and even those who do not have a formal degree will take some seminars and classes on this topic.

If you don't attend church regularly then you may not have a pastor already at hand to help you. Some churches may require a membership term before you can approach the pastor for such counseling.

If you are in a circumstance where you cannot get pastoral counseling then you may want to consider a couples retreat. You can call some of the churches in your area to find out if they have any upcoming couple’s retreats. These are weekend seminars that can be quite effective at helping to bring couples back together. You can also use this opportunity to establish a relationship with a pastor at the retreat who may then be able to give you further marriage counseling.

Couple's retreats can help you to work through many issues. You may have some couple sessions and there will also be some group sessions and there may be times when you get to work through questions individually.

Communication is encouraged and is very important at these retreats. Communication is vital in a marriage and if you can improve your communication you will have a good chance at repairing any damage and saving your marriage.

Other issues such as finances, child raising and even sexual relations will be addresses at a couple's retreat. The goal here is to get you back on track on all areas of your relationship. The goal is that you and your spouse can learn to communicate about these issues and begin to understand one another’s feelings, so that you can both make changes to help maintain a healthy relationship.

Marriage isn't always a bed of roses, there will be tough moments that you need to work together to get through. If you are having marriage problems then consider seeking pastoral counseling to save your marriage.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Wednesday 20 April 2011

Forget Divorce - Save Your Marriage

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Is your marriage having trouble to the extent that you are considering getting a divorce? Well have you thought about seeing a marriage counselor? There are many different marriage counselors and it can be difficult knowing which one is worth going to. Let's take a look at some things you should look out for in a marriage counselor.

The first thing you need to do is to find out what their credentials are. There are basically three types of counselors as follows:

1. Ph.D. or Psy.D. level counselor. These counselors have put in the hard work to get their positions. They have been to graduate school for a minimum of five years and would have written a dissertation. They would have performed at least 3000 hours of therapy while supervised by an experienced psychologist. A person must have a doctoral level degree to be legally referred to as a 'clinical psychologist'. Ph.D.'s, although they have put in the hard work, can tend to be more academic in nature and you may find that they will do a bit of forensic work along with the therapy.

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2. M.S.W. - Master of Social Work. This type of counselor is trained to apply social theory to specific situations. They can work with individuals or with institutions.

3. M.S. or M.A. - or also known as 'Marriage and Family Therapist'. These counselors may only work with individuals or with small groups. They will have gained a 2 year degree and have done 1500 hours of supervised therapy.

If you are planning to use insurance cover to help fund your marriage counseling then they will probably point you in the direction of a Marriage and Family Therapist or a M.S.W. as these are less expensive than a Ph.D. level counselor.

The second thing you need to do is find out how much the counseling will cost. You will find that clinical psychologists are generally more expensive and Marriage and Family Therapists will be the least expensive. The least expensive may not always be the best option, you need to choose the best option for saving your marriage.

You need to consider both the individual session cost as well as the overall cost for the entire length of treatment.

Some therapists may have a sliding scale fee and this is often based on a couple's income. It is usually non-profit institutions that will offer this type of fee which can make counseling affordable for those who may not otherwise be able to afford it.

The third thing that you need to look at is the policies that a therapist has. Some questions you may want to ask are:

* Do you still pay for a session if you miss it or cancel it?
* If you go on vacation and let them know ahead that you will miss a session will you still be required to pay for it?
* Does the therapist accept phone calls at home or outside of normal session times?
* Is there an alternative therapist that you can call in an emergency?

A Marriage and Family Therapist is trained to help families work through any issues so it is their job to help you to save your marriage. You should feel comfortable talking to a counselor and if for any reason you just don't feel comfortable with a particular therapist then you should stop seeing them and find one that you will be comfortable with.

Before giving up on your marriage and filing for divorce, try marriage counseling to try and save your marriage.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Tuesday 19 April 2011

Have You Found Yourself The Dumped Boyfriend

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If you find yourself in the position of being the dumped boyfriend you may be wondering where you went wrong. Let's take a look at a particular scenario that resulted with Max being the dumped boyfriend. Max was invited to a party but his girlfriend Sarah wasn't able to go along. Max went to the party anyway, had a few too many drinks and ended up making out with some girl he didn't even know. Some of Sarah's friends were at the party and they wasted no time letting her know about Max's cheating!

Sarah called Max and dumped him. Among the many unprintable names that she called him, she told him that she never wanted to see him again.

Max felt terrible about the whole situation. He had too many drinks and made a bad judgement call but he really didn't think one bad call was enough reason to end a perfectly good relationship. So Max tried everything he could to get Sarah back, but he went about it all wrong.

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His first mistake (other than the obvious one with the random girl he made out with) was that he grovelled when Sarah called. He begged Sarah to take him back when he should have just apologized for his mistake and moved on. Sarah is very angry at this time so it isn't the time for grovelling as that will only make her angrier, she needs time to calm down.

Max's next mistake was that he kept hounding her to come back to him. Over the next few days he sent her more than a hundred texts and called her numerous times every day. He sent flowers to her work and her home. Then in a big desperate effort to get her back he went and sang love songs outside her window. It was at this point that her neighbours called the police.

When a woman is this angry with a man, she needs to be alone. She needs time to herself to calm down and get past the angry stage. She needs time to think things through but Max didn't give Sarah the time she needed.

When Max realized that what he was doing wasn't working, he took the whole 'win her back campaign' to the next level. He started dating one of Sarah's best friends and he made sure that Sarah noticed.

Right now Max doesn't stand much chance of changing his dumped boyfriend status!

Sarah's friend Ruth hadn't had a boyfriend for a while and Max knew this so he asked her out and she accepted. Max was silly enough to then call Sarah to ask her for advice on where to take Ruth on their date. Max's plan was to make Sarah jealous so that she'd beg him to take her back but instead Sarah was furious. She isn't stupid, she knew exactly what Max was doing and was very angry that Max would take advantage of her friend Ruth to get back at her. She was also very angry at Ruth for agreeing to go on a date with Max.

Everything that Max is doing is having the opposite effect of what he wants. He is playing the desperate ex boyfriend role which is not the way to win back your ex.

Sarah moved on from Max and soon started dating a new guy and when Max found out he did everything in his power to break them up. Max really had burned all of his bridges by this time, all he had managed to do was push Sarah further away and ruined any hope of them reconciling.

This story could have had a completely different ending if Max had played his cards right even after that stupid mistake he made at that party. Sarah could have forgiven him for his lapse in judgement that night if he had approached things in a different way but because he acted like a desperate fool he lost her for good. If you are the dumped boyfriend, be careful at how you approach the situation or you just might stay the dumped boyfriend.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Monday 18 April 2011

Evaluating Your Marriage Break Up- Take The Time

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You may be feeling quite overwhelmed if you are dealing with a marriage break up. With all there is to think about and deal with you may not know where to start. It is best to step back, clear your head and then sort everything out logically and if possible without too much emotion attached.

When you get married you believe that the marriage will last forever and it can come as a big shock when that marriage falls apart. Your planned life has suddenly changed drastically and you aren't sure where your life is heading anymore. Then there are so many issues to take care of, both emotionally and financially. The issues can be much worse if you have children involved who will also be affected by a divorce.

There may be a chance that you can work things out and get your marriage back together. This does happen between couples if they can sit down and talk about what the problems are in their marriage without it turning into an argument. If you find that every time you try to talk about things you both walk away angrier than before, then perhaps you should use a mediator.

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A marriage counselor can help you to talk things through and work out your issues. A church pastor or minister is another option and often quite a good one. A pastor tends to be more committed to helping save marriages as it is what the church firmly believes in. A pastor will genuinely want to help you to restore your marriage and will do what he can to assist you with that.

If your marriage is beyond repair and you know that it is over for good then you need to accept that it is over and start planning for your future. A good divorce attorney is always a good idea and it really is best to get all your finances and assets settled sooner rather than later.

To settle all the financial matters you may need to consider selling your house and splitting the proceeds or one party buying out the other. You will need to split any bank account balances or loans. Then there is the furniture and appliances in your home, you will need to decide who will take what. It is best to get all of these things sorted out early so you can get closure and move on. If you delay settling these issues then it can be difficult to move on.

The hardest thing to handle during a marriage break up is if there are children involved and you need to decide on custody. It is important to put the child's best interests first and always do what is best for them. Don't try to influence the way the child feels about the other parent as this can confuse and even damage a child psychologically. You also need to be careful of the children's feelings about the divorce as many children will think that it is somehow their fault so you need to make sure that your child knows that the divorce is not his fault. Assure the children that you love them and that the problem lies between you and your ex and nothing to do with them.

Never get your children stuck in the middle of fights between you and your ex. Don't talk badly about your ex in front of them or do anything to alienate them from the other parent. Unless the children have been abused by your ex, then there should be no reason why he can't have some access to the children.

Try to work together with your ex to arrange visitation times and custody. It is best if you can work it out between you instead of dragging it through court and fighting over custody arrangements. Try to be flexible with visitation too, if your ex can't have the kids on time on his allocated night, swap it for another night. For the sake of the kids it is best to try and be negotiable.

Whatever you do, don't ever let the kids think that the divorce is their fault and don't get them caught in the middle of any arguments or custody battles. Your future planning must always incorporate your children and have them as your first priority.

Marriage break ups aren't easy but you will get through it and move on with your life.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Sunday 17 April 2011

Getting Your Ex-Boyfriend Back- Think About Why He Left First

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If you need help getting your ex-boyfriend back then before you make any rash decisions you need to take some time to sit down and think about what really happened. Did he leave you or did you drive him away? The answer to this question will determine which path you have to take in order to correct this.

When a man leaves a relationship, it is for one of three reasons: he found someone else, he is looking for someone else and doesn’t want to wait until he finds her to leave, or you have done something that has hurt him so much to make him believe that he is no longer wanted.
If he has found someone else, do you really want him back? If he left once, then he doesn’t value the relationship enough to care about you. Chances are extremely high that he would do it again. This is not a healthy relationship. In fact, it is not a relationship: it is an infatuation on your part. He is just along for the ride.

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If he left because he wants someone else and he hasn’t even found them yet, this is a clear indication of two things. It is over between the two of you, and he isn’t ready to settle down with just one person. Not even having someone else lined up means he might not want to be tied to one person, which is also cause to run.

The last scenario is the best option because it means that he cares for you. If a guy leaves because he was hurt by you then he still cares. That means there is a chance that he will come back- if you make amends in the right way.
You need to immediately contact him to talk, but not in person: just over the phone. And no emails or texts either. He needs to hear the sincerity in your voice.

Remain calm and ask him to consider giving you another chance. Tell him that the separation has opened your eyes to realize that being without him hurts too much. The relationship is worth working on and you are ready to commit whatever it takes to prove it to him. Then let him talk. Ask him what it will take to bring you back together. The more he talks, the better chance you have of getting your ex-boyfriend back.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Saturday 16 April 2011

Save My Marriage- Put Your Marriage First

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Often, couples come to a point in their relationship where things are not as they once were. They feel separated, lonely, and sometimes even as if the other person does not love them with the intensity that once existed. Deep down, they might be feeling “I want to save my marriage”, but they simply don’t know where to begin.

This is the time to place all of the cares of the world to the side and bring the marriage back in first place- where it should have always been. Typically, this is one of the number one reasons why couples have problems. Not everyday, life problems: but issues that should not have advanced to a much higher, and more costly, level.

One of the main problems facing couples is that they do not resolve issues as they occur. One person may feel “its too small to matter”, or “I should just let it go”. But if it is big enough to contemplate it as a problem, then it is a big enough problem to work out now. What is a minor issue now can lead to a major fight later, if left unresolved.

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We have all heard how important communication is in a relationship. But part of that equation also involves openness. Many people falsely believe that the two are one and the same, but in actuality, they can be quite different.

Communication involves talking to your spouse and telling them how you feel. Openness defines how much you communicate. Just saying that you want to communicate is one thing: saying you want to be open about anything is an entirely different matter.

Men are notorious for making this mistake. Many are taught from a young age to guard their emotions, not let them out, and if so, only in small, inconspicuous amounts that will not attract attention or deter from their manhood. He may feel as if he is guarding his emotions, but at the same time he is being reserved. Being reserved doesn’t solve a problem: being open does.

If we trust our companion enough to marry, to single them out to devote our life to, and to cherish for the rest of our lives, then why not be open with them, too? Many areas of a person’s life involve things that they might consider inconsequential, or not worth bring up. If a person really feels that, “I want to save my marriage”, then let the spouse decide if they are inconsequential or not.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Friday 15 April 2011

How Can I Save My Marriage-Dont Put Off What You Can Start Doing Today

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“How can I save my marriage?” This question comes up so often with friends talking over coffee, or from a phone call to a best friend that they need to confide in. While things may seem hopeless, the answers could be very obvious. But life sometimes causes us not to see the answers for the problem.

It’s like the old adage: “You can’t see the forest for the trees”. This rings so true for marriage. Many times, we become so wrapped up in problems that we don’t give ourselves the chance to adequately search for the solution. We focus on the wreck instead of the cleanup. Getting over what is going on means being able to shift focus on how to resolve it. If we can focus on it enough to contemplate how much damage it is causing a marriage, then focusing on its resolution should get equal attention.

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If there is a problem in a marriage then worrying about it isn’t going to fix it. This is where communication comes in. Focusing on the problem isn’t going to resolve it: neither is fighting over it or hiding resentment or anger. Bringing it all out for both sides to see, and discuss, is what needs to happen. And the sooner this happens, the better.

The best course of action here is to set aside time when both spouses can engage in conversation without distractions: “without distractions” being the key here. If this cannot be accomplished without interruptions or “life” butting in, then this is not the time. This is something that deserves full attention. If it is serious enough that one party feels their marriage is in jeopardy then that should be enough to warrant pushing all other areas to the side.

Once you have quiet, alone time, sit down and one person begins talking. If only one person feels this is an issue then they will start and have ample time to bring out their concerns. Perhaps a time limit could be imposed so that both sides get equal opportunity to address the concern.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Thursday 14 April 2011

Help Me Save My Marriage-Enter With Caution

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Many people have gotten that frantic call from a close friend: “help me save my marriage!” This scenario happens all too often and many times we don’t want to get involved. But as an outsider looking in, sometimes you have no choice but to help.

A third party needs to evaluate the relationship to see if they can help. Sometimes, it is something as simple as lending an ear. A sympathetic shoulder to cry on is often just what is needed if the spouse is not willing to listen. Surprisingly, being able to unload anxiety and emotions can benefit a couple in the midst of trying to repair their marriage.
The boundaries are not always clear in these cases, so caution has to be exercised. A woman becoming too involved in a marital dilemma will be seen as an intruder by the husband. He will feel as if it is now two against one. Even if the wrongs are corrected, chances are he will never look at the friend the same way again.

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That is why discretion has to be of the utmost importance. It is very easy to step over the line and cause more damage than was originally present. The only time that it is a good idea to intervene is when there is obvious proof that he is the main cause of the dispute. If it becomes blatantly obvious that the husband is the primary reason behind what is transpiring then a friend can be of assistance to the wife. However, this would never work for a man. If a female friend were to try to console the husband, it might appear as if she is trying to break up the marriage.

The safest bet is for the friend to suggest counseling to the couple. Bringing in an outsider who does not have a vested interest in either side will help to bring stability to the situation. But even this decision needs to be cautiously considered. If a woman is the reason for the disturbance in the relationship then a male counselor might be the better option. If the wife has had a transgression with another man, then perhaps a female counselor would set the husband more at ease.

The bottom line is, if a friend asks you to “help me save my marriage”, then it has to be discreetly handled and in a way that will not place attention or blame on one party more than another.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Wednesday 13 April 2011

How To Get Your Ex-girlfriend Back- Really Are You Sure

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If you want to know how to get your ex-girlfriend back there is good news and bad news. The good news is that there is hope and, in many cases, things can eventually work out. The bad news is that this is not always the case. Sometimes things simply don’t work out- no matter how much you want it to.

Whether or not an ex will come back depends on a number of situations. First off: why did she leave in the first place? If it was something that you did then it might not be repairable in her eyes. If she were bored with the relationship then maybe she won’t come back. And if she doesn’t want to be in the relationship anymore then you definitely don’t want her back.

For the first scenario, if cheating is involved you have to ask yourself: if the roles were reversed, would you be willing to forgive and forget? Even if she does come back, there would always be hesitation to completely trust you again. So you have to ask yourself: why did you cheat in the first place? Obviously, something was missing.

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If she left because she was bored with the relationship then you may simply not be compatible. Sometimes two people just aren’t meant to be together. No matter how much you may care for someone, you can’t make them like, or love, you. And you wouldn’t want to. Was she bored because you wouldn’t pay her attention? Were you open with her? Did you put her first? These are things that you have to ask yourself. Re-evaluating your relationship will give you answers that you need- and may not want to admit.

If she just doesn’t want to be connected to you, why would you want her back? There has to be a reason why someone would blatantly reveal this news to you and yet you keep coming back for more. If this is the sad case, then you are just setting yourself up for continuous, and repeated, heartache.

If you really want to know how to get your ex-girlfriend back then sometimes it is worth the try to talk to her one more time. Once she leaves, give her a few days to cool off. Not responding right away shows her that you are not needy. You should call her now to ask her for one last favor. If she is willing to talk you, then you can conveniently get all of your questions answered at once.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Tuesday 12 April 2011

How To Save Your Marriage If You Are A Couple With Problems

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Are you a couple with problems? Not just everyday problems, but ones that threaten your very relationship? If you are one of the many couples who want to know how to save your marriage, there is good news: it is possible, and it’s easier than you may think.

To pinpoint a solution, you first have to know what the problem is. And it’s not always the most obvious problem, either. Many times, it is something that has been lying dormant, festering, and building momentum. In fact, it often starts with something that is seemingly not what a person is focusing on. But once the floodgates of emotions start to pour out in a heated discussion, it becomes evident that the most obvious reasons for feeling apart are not the only ones.

That is why communication is so vital in a marriage. When couples date, they talk about everything- even things that other people would not find interesting. But to a couple, hanging off of the other person’s every word is what builds the relationship and, over time, causes them to want to share every moment- whether it is a defining one, or not.

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But once couples settle into marriage, things change. Conversations become less frequent, and shorter. Things that used to matter are now just an ordinary occurrence. That’s when life takes over and puts communication in the back seat. Putting less emphasis on talking means shutting down sooner, and over smaller and smaller issues.

At the same time, it also means putting less urgency on the important matters. Serious issues become less serious, less serious ones become blasé, and ordinary issues become irrelevant. Downgrading our feelings and our emotions becomes second nature and requires less talk.

This is the time to revert back to dating. Going back to a time when everything was important is what needs to happen. If it were once important, it still should be- regardless of how many other things are crowding our lives. Despite the cliché, talk is not cheap- it is imperative. Without communication, everything else starts to crumble and those things that used to matter no longer hold significance.

It might even become necessary to have scheduled talking time. This might sound a little extreme, but forcing time to sit together to reflect will start a pattern. Soon, the pattern becomes a habit, and later on, an obsession. Want to know how to save your marriage? It’s simple: remember how to talk to one another.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Monday 11 April 2011

Is There Hope To Save A Marriage- How Bad Do You Want This

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Is there hope to save a marriage that is full of despair and turmoil? Well, many times there is. Even though there is no guarantee, there is much that can be done to repair a relationship – even when it seems hopeless.

Marriage may not always be rosy and perfect, but it should take quite a bit to give cause for ending it. More often than not, the things that couples feel are grounds for divorce are actually things that could be worked out if the couple only had the right tools to enact.

Couples should not give up hope as long as they can communicate with each other. When things get bad, pointing out what needs to occur in order to get back on track needs to be a team effort. Having only one person on board will not work. Marriage takes two to work, so when things are askew then it will take both to set it right.

If a couple can talk, they have a chance at anything. When they lose that ability there is very little hope, unless it can be re-established. But in order for that to happen both sides must want to make it work. This, too, requires commitment.

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Many times there is a need for counseling, especially if talking cannot be resolved amicably. Bringing in an outside source to mediate is often needed to bring a balance, since the third party won’t be persuaded to choose sides. Bringing a clear perspective to the table also means that it can be seen from the eyes of an outsider, so there is no hidden agenda in any decision that might be rendered.

Counselors are available in any area of the country so it comes down to finding one that both sides are comfortable with. Depending on the issue, it might be decided for them. For example, if a husband has cheated then it might be in the best interest not to choose a woman if the wife is still reeling from the affair. It needs to be a mutual decision as to what is best for the counseling, and not who feels they can get an ally on their side.

So, the question remains: is there hope to save a marriage when it feels like everything is lost? The answer is yes, if both sides want it to be saved.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Sunday 10 April 2011

How To Save A Marriage Comes Down To Patience

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For couples that find themselves in the predicament of contemplating divorce, the first thing that they need to do is stop everything. This is not the time to make hasty decisions. If you want to know how to save a marriage it comes down to patience.

Since marriage is such an important bonding of two people, it should be preserved and guarded with every fiber of their beings. But often when couples flash the divorce card they have not exhausted all of their options. It comes down to frustration and unhappiness and how those two emotions are currently running their lives. Focusing on the love that brought the two together is what the focus should now be.

Almost every problem that develops in a marriage can be resolved with the start of one simple word: communication. We have all heard this before, but when it boils down to it, there really is a lot of basis for this concept. Being able to talk things out makes them resolved on a much lower, and often, inconsequential level instead of letting them brood and become major issues.

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For example, if a wife hates that her husband throws his clothes on the floor when he comes home, instead of picking them up and not wanting to start a tiff, she should say something then. But what normally occurs is that she puts it in the back of her mind, thinking that it is too insignificant to bring up. She justifies burying her resentment by thinking, “he has so much on his mind”, or “he works so hard”. After a few years of picking up clothes the animosity builds and comes out in a fight about a totally unrelated subject.

Once the avalanche of emotions start to flow, everything that she has been harboring comes out- even the “insignificant” things. Suddenly, a minor annoyance has become World War III. He becomes defensive and confused since it was never brought up; she resents and gives accusations on why he doesn’t care, and the fight goes on and on.

All of these scenarios can be avoided if issues are pinpointed as they occur. Thinking something is not worth bringing up only places it in the back of your mind to build on later. After all, discussing it now beats yelling about it later.

Lack of communication is always singled out as a major problem in marriage. And for good reason: it is the single most important topic that a couple can exercise as a way of how to save a marriage because it can be used to reward, or reprimand, almost any area of life that the two will encounter.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Saturday 9 April 2011

How To Get Over Someone You Love

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Going through a break up is never an enjoyable experience. Even if the two of you split up on friendly terms, there will be some negative feelings. You will feel hurt, angry, guilty and confused. Such emotions are to be expected, but there is one feeling that may be harder to deal with, and that is how to get over someone you love. Don't worry, all of this is completely normal.

Before you start trying to get over your ex, you need to make sure that's what you really want to do. Your emotions will be running high after a break up, and it's easy to confuse one feeling for another. So, it's very possible that the reason you can't get over them is because you don't want to...you just think you do.

Yes, it can be confusing, so you need to calm down first. You need to let the dust of the broken relationship settle for a while before you make any permanent decisions. There is always a chance that you will realize that you want to try to work things out. However, for the rest of this article, we will assume that you have already thought it through and now you need to know how to get over someone you love.

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Getting your ex out of your mind can be tricky, but it is possible. A lot of amateurs in giving out relationship advice will tell you to focus on all of the bad stuff your ex did. The thinking here is that hating them will erase them from your memory, but the opposite is true. It will only amplify their memory and it's not fair to your ex.

A better way is to forgive your ex for all of the bad stuff they may have done. This will take away any of the power they still seem to have over you. It will also allow you to start moving forward with your own life, which takes us to the next step.

While you won't be able to completely erase the memory of your ex from your mind, you can overpower it for a while. The way to do this is to go out and life your life to the fullest extent possible. The more things you have to occupy your time, and occupy your mind, the less space there will be for you to think about your former partner.

Finally, when it comes to how to get over someone you love you need to be realistic. It isn't about forgetting about them 100%. After all, if you had good memories together, you should be able to look back on those in the future. But, you need to be able to move forward, so it's important to get them out of your mind, especially right after the break up. Then, after a bit of time goes by you can start to think about them in a healthy, well-adjusted manner; without it making you feel upset.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Friday 8 April 2011

Relationship Counseling - You both have to Want to GO

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Being together with someone you care about isn't always easy. You may have started off on the right foot, and may have thought that you would be that happy for the rest of your life...but then reality paid you a visit and now things aren't looking quite as good. What may surprise you is that over half of all couples have received relationship counseling of some kind while they were together. Here are some things for you to consider when it comes to seeing a counselor.

A counselor is not a miracle worker. They can't just wave a magic wand and make your relationship perfect. What they can do is listen to each of you (separately and together), and offer suggestions based on what you have told them.

The purpose of visiting a counselor is not to win some imaginary contest, nor is it to prove you are right and that your partner is wrong. If that's your attitude, then you can be sure that changing that attitude is one of the first things the counselor is going to try to do. In some ways--depending how bad things are--the counselor's role is to tear down all of the nasty walls you have put up, and then rebuild on a more harmonious foundation.

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One thing you should watch out for is more arguing. What? Yes, that's right, a lot of couples find that they argue more after their first few sessions of relationship counseling. That's because they are learning new ways to communicate, and this change can bring stress of its own. Don't worry, though, if you stick with the counseling you will get past this and start to get along better and better.

Just having somebody to listen to your side of things can be quite therapeutic. Maybe you feel like your partner doesn't get what you're trying to say, or maybe you feel like they ignore you completely. Either way, having an objective party lending an ear can be a great way to work through things.

But why use a counselor at all, can't you get a lot of the same information from self-help books? You sure can. Let me ask you this: have you tried any of those books, and if so, how are they working for you? If they're not working, that's okay, it's not your fault. See, the author can only pass along what they know, but they don't know you personally. Their advice may be wonderful...for somebody else, but it just doesn't work for you. A counselor can listen to your specific problems and then craft solutions that will work best for your specific situation.

There is a catch to all of this. Nothing will happen if you do nothing. While that may sound like common sense, far too many couples go to relationship counseling and never follow through on any of the qualified professional advice they are given. That's too bad because if they did, they could end up being happier than ever. The good news is that the choice to be happy is all yours.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Thursday 7 April 2011

Save A Marriage-Communication Is The Key

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Every marriage is important so each one deserves a full effort from both parties. But sometimes a couple will experience trouble and it seems that there is no way to solve the problem without divorce. If this is happening to you there are ways to save a marriage, but it will take effort on the part of both people.

The important thing to remember here is communication. Often, as couples settle into their marriage, they start to become complacent. They feel as if there is no further need to put any effort into their relationship. Both people fall into a routine and life just happens without giving any special attention to it. This is the main problem with marriage today.

If there has not been a consistent effort from both parties then now is not the time to focus on that: this is more of a survival period. This is the time that you both need to sit down together and talk. No arguing, and no finger pointing: just talk.

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This is the time to be brutally honest. Write down everything that you love about the other person. Make the list as long as you can. Now, look over the list. When was the last time that you told the other person how much you love these traits about them? People love to feel wanted and this would be a good time to start letting the other person know that they are, in fact, wanted.

Ask the other person if there are things you can do to make the marriage better for them. Couples always go out of their way for each other until they marry. Then, they settle in for the long haul and things start to slip. Recognizing an area that needs improvement shows that you are genuinely interested in working on it. Showing effort and concern shows the other person that you do to want to give up and they shouldn’t either.

If communication has broken down too far then do not be afraid to bring in outside help. Counselors are trained to listen and will not take sides. And sometimes seeing things from an outside perspective brings clarity to the problem.

Many people want to save a marriage, but they might just feel so frustrated that they think it is too late. There is always time to start the healing process. Communication, patience, understanding and love are all important parts that must work together in order to be successful.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Wednesday 6 April 2011

Mending Broken Heart- Sooner Better Than Later

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Love can be cruel sometimes as is evident in some relationships. If mending broken hearts seems to be a reoccurring theme in your life then you need to sit back and reevaluate what is happening to cause this vicious cycle to occur in the first place.

No one likes having their heart broken, but they especially don’t like for it to happen repeatedly. The bad part is when someone doesn’t know that it is coming. That makes the pain even worse. When this happens the first step is to look back and see if there were any warning signs.

Sometimes signs are evident to others, but the person that it is happening to is oblivious to what is going on. This might be because they are preoccupied with the situation or they are just trying to ignore it in the hopes that it will go away. Were there any signs that this was going to occur? If so, you have to find out why they occurred in the first place.

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Even though losing love is hard it is not the end of the world. Undoubtedly, the one who is hurt will hear this from others, but it is, in fact, the truth. This is a time to be with others and be surrounded with friends and family. This is not the time to hear people bashing your partner, unless it is obviously justified. The key here is to get out of the house. Sitting around just invites in pity and sorrow, which is something that is not going to help at this point.

The sooner that the hurt individual gets back out into the world the easier the recovery time will be. Letting things languish only drags out the pain. They should never try to contact the other person since further rejection will only open up old wounds. If it is meant to be they will see the separation as an eye-opening experience.

After you have had some time to heal then the last step is to sit down and see what you have learned. Were you too needy? Did you rush the relationship and possibly scare them away? Or were they possibly the wrong person for you? If you think about it enough the answer will present itself to you. Have a good friend sit down with you and talk it over. Sometimes a different view can bring things into perspective. Just remember: mending broken hearts is not easy, but it is possible.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Tuesday 5 April 2011

To Win Back Love May Seem Impossible But It Can Be Done

Get back with your ex

What does it take to win back love? That is not an easy question to answer since there are so many variables that come into play. And since every relationship is different the same rules do not apply for everyone. But, as a general rule, to bring that special person back into your life there are a few things that can be done.

First things first: let things cool off for awhile. This might be a few days or a week or more, depending on how things ended. If it was a particularly ugly breakup it might need for time than that. The key here is not to rush it.

An important point to make here is not to be needy. Neither men nor women like for their significant other to be needy. This is the same as holding up a sign that says, “I’m going to smother you”. If it doesn’t send people running immediately, it will, at the least, put them on the defense.

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Giving the person their space will also give them time to think over what has happened. They will wonder if it were for the best, or if it was a mistake. You want them to have this time to reconsider the situation. That way, there is no outside influence from you. All of their decisions and feelings will be forced to come from only them and no outside persuasion. That way, whatever they decide cannot be blamed on anyone else: they will have to take sole responsibility.

Once the cooling-off period has lapsed, then it is time to make contact. This does not need to be anything serious: just idle conversation. This is not the time to fall apart. Hopefully, the separation period has allowed sufficient time for grieving and you can present yourself more put together and rational.

If they are willing to meet- play it cool. No collapsing and weeping uncontrollably. Treat them like a good friend seeing another good friend and let them establish how they want to react. Let them offer to hug, to kiss or whatever they decide. This will give you an indication of how far off you are from mending things.

Bring up that you would like to try again and this time take it slower. This shows that you are not desperate, but that you are still interested in them. You can’t force someone back into love, but you can ease them into it. If you are going to win back love it takes time and patience on both parts.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Monday 4 April 2011

Relationship Break Up Get Back Together

Get back with your ex

Often people have a relationship, break up, get back together and then break up again. So what is going on? Is the relationship on or is it off? This can be a confusing time, but this is when things need to be evaluated by both sides.

Couples have differences all of the time, even after marriage. No relationship is completely perfect. Anytime you place two different individuals together there are going to be little spats-that’s just the way life works. The key is to determine if they are insignificant disagreements or if something else is going on that might be a little more serious.

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Almost everyone has been in at least one relationship where there were little tiffs here and there and it seemed as if both people just couldn’t seem to work out all of the details. If there was always a little static present between the two it would account for breaking up once, or even more than once. But whatever it was that caused the difference of opinions, was it worth breaking up over or was it just the excuse needed to end the relationship? This is something that has to be answered.

In a true relationship that is meant to be, there are always going to be differences. But these couples work through it. Breaking up should not be the first answer for a solution that they come up with. It seems as if there is something deeper and this is the excuse to finally make the move to end things.

Also, it needs to be determined if it is the same person who is always offering to end things. If this is the case, then it might be the problem of only one person. This might, in fact, actually be a one-sided relationship. In that case, the one who is interested in continuing it needs to see that they are apparently the only one interested in being vested as a couple.

Some couples just can’t work things out and in this case, some couples should see that this is a clue that maybe things were not meant to be. If that were not the case, then it would not be such a struggle to stay a couple. If you are in the cycle of being in a relationship, break up, get back together and so on, then there is a reason that this keeps happening. Maybe your feelings are trying to tell you something.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce

Sunday 3 April 2011

Get Someone Back Takes Time

Get back with your ex

For those who want to get someone back that they were in a relationship with it does not need to be the end of he world. Often, things can be patched up, as long as it is done in the right manner and with the right intent. Going about it the wrong way will only result in driving them farther away.

The first thing to do is to give her back her space. This is crucial, but vitally important. She needs time to be alone. Most men will worry that during this separation of contact there will be another man to slide into his place. If the relationship is salvageable then this won’t be the case. She just needs time to sort things out and having someone hover over her every move will only complicate matters.

Click to get your ex back


Also during this time is when the man needs to reassess the relationship. This means to get on with your life. It does not mean to go after every woman that you come in contact with, but it is fine to start talking to them and continuing friendships. This might actually work to your advantage.

The woman needs to see that she should get back with you so this will probably send her the message that your life has not become irreparably crippled since she left. Not only is this the right message for her but also it shows her that you are a strong man, which is what women want.

It is also a good idea during this transition period that a man continues to keep up his appearance. It is important to dress in the same manner that he would if his girlfriend were still around. Nothing flashy, and nothing sloppy- just ordinary. Either she will see him out in public or one of her friends will get word back to her. If it is a friend the first thing she will ask is “how did he look?” She will want to know how the breakup is affecting him. When she finds out he has gone on with his life, seemingly unscathed, it will cause her to take another look at what happened.

If a man is going to get someone back it needs to be for the right reasons. The reconciliation should be based on the fact that he feels that she is a good match. If there is hesitation in these thoughts then perhaps he needs to re-evaluate the relationship again.

6 tips to help your ex to fall back in love with you

How to get Your Wife Back After a Breakup or Divorce