Getting married is supposed to be one of the happiest days of our lives, and it usually is. However, we often go into marriage thinking that everything is going to be wonderful and that our love for one another will only grow stronger. It may even seem that way at first, but then reality sets in as time goes on. Then...all of sudden you find out your spouse wants a divorce! What happened? Whatever it was, all you want to know right now is how to stop divorce. It won't be easy, but it is possible to patch things up in most cases.
When it comes to stopping a divorce, you have to convince your spouse to give the marriage another chance, right? That only makes sense. But the problem is that such an approach doesn't really work. Your spouse has already made the decision to split up, and the more you push the idea of staying together, the more they will pull away. You obviously don't want that to happen. As you will see, there is a better way.
The first thing to do is accept the fact that they want a divorce. Don't be in denial, and don't pretend like it will just get better on its own. Be calm and let them know that you don't want a divorce but understand that things are not going as good as they could be. In other words, try to be as understanding of your spouse's feelings as you can and listen to what they have to say. Don't get angry, and don't use your emotions to manipulate them. Your goal is to start an open discussion with your spouse.
Do not try to convince them of anything at this point. If you do, they will only see it as you trying to stop divorce. Yes, that's what you are doing, but your spouse will only become more stubborn about wanting a divorce if they know what you're up to. So, focus on trying to see where your spouse is coming from.
Once you understand their reasons for wanting a divorce, agree with them. Yes, agree with them. This will put them more at ease, and it shows that you are taking their concerns seriously. This is like having your foot in the door. This alone may be enough to make them reconsider. If not, that's okay, there are still some things you can do.
If the divorce papers have not been filed, then you have an even better chance to stop divorce. After the two of you have talked, give your spouse some time to think things over. Don't pester them, and don't ask them, "so do you still want a divorce?" If they still don't want to work things out then you can always propose a trial separation as a last resort. This may not be the best solution, but there is always a chance that your spouse will change their mind once they are on their own.
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