Dealing with a break up is never an easy thing to do. If you find you're having difficulty coping with things after a relationship has come to an end, don't worry, you are experiencing a perfectly normal reaction. However, you can't spend the rest of your life trying to deal with a failed relationship.
There are two main options available to you for dealing with a break up. The first option is to let it keep eating away at you and to let it rip you apart, figuratively speaking. This is similar to the idea of "that which doesn't kill me only makes me stronger". Well, that may be true, to some degree, but that doesn't mean it's the best choice for coping with your new situation. The second option is to face it head on and work through it. The first option you can do without any help, though it is not advised. With that in mind, here are some thoughts on the second option.
Break ups can leave a deep emotional impact, but that doesn't mean you have to let a break up destroy you as a person. You will do much better from a survival standpoint if you are able to continually remind yourself that one incident is not what defines you. It's difficult for any relationship to come to an end, whether it's a marriage of more than twenty years, or a romantic fling of a few months. Depending on the circumstances it can be easy to let it have a negative impact on your self-esteem. If this is the case, don't hesitate to get some help from a counselor or even a trusted friend. Just remember that you don't have to go through this alone. It's better to handle these problems before they get out of hand.
It's not easy. Anybody who has been through a break up would agree with that. Sometimes just knowing others have gone through the same thing can bring some comfort. Talk about it, but not in a negative way as this will only push away the people most willing to help. Just find somebody else that can relate to what you're going through. Yes, your situation is different, and nobody else can truly understand what you're going through, but even a little bit of understanding can go a long way.
The other important part of dealing with a break up is to not obsess over it. You still have a life to live, so live it. Even if you just have to go through the motions for a while, it's vital that you try to hold on to some semblance of normalcy. You may want to avoid the places and things you most closely associate with your ex, at least for a while. Now, you can't avoid the whole world, so there will be times when you just need to face things and handle them as good as you can.
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