Ah yes...falling in love, isn't it wonderful? Sure it is! Being in a loving relationship is a great place to be, but it's a sad fact of life that it can also come to an end. All too often it happens without warning, and that only makes it worse. Perhaps you have recently went through a break up and are sad because it's over. Well, there may be some hope. The vast majority of people in similar situations have been able to patch things up. So, if you are wondering how to back with your ex, then read on!
You can't kid yourself that it's going to be easy. You can't kid yourself that you shouldn't take it seriously. Chances are good that your feelings are all messed up right now--that's perfectly normal. Go ahead and take some time to work through those emotions, but don't get stuck on them. If you want to get your ex back, then you're going to have to have a clear head from here on out.
One thing that will help you to clear your head is to break off all contact with your ex for a while. This won't be permanent, but it has to be long enough so the two of you can work through some of what happened. There will come a time when the two of you can work through it together, but you each need to come to terms with it on your own first. Just so we're clear, 'no contact' means no emails, text messages, telephone calls, relaying messages through mutual friends, and no bumping into them "accidentally".
You need to spend some of this alone time taking care of yourself. Sure, you may feel rotten, but consider what type of person your ex is more likely to want back. Is it somebody who is well-adjusted, confident, and has healthy self-esteem; or is it somebody who's depressed, doesn't take care of themselves and is mad at the world? Go out with friends and live your life. Take care of yourself physically and emotionally.
The other thing you need to do during this alone time is to figure what went wrong. What led to the two of you breaking up? If you want to get back with your ex, then you have to go through this process (and it is a process). You have to get to the root causes of the problems you had has a couple. It's not enough to say arguing led to the break up, for example. Instead, you need to get to the cause of the arguing. This step may be somewhat painful, but it is necessary if you want any chance of getting back together.
Once these steps are complete, you can get in touch with your ex again. Discuss the things each of you have been thinking about while you were apart. Make a plan to fix what went wrong, and be willing to stick with it even when is seems hard. Doing all of these things will put you on the right track to get back with your ex.
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