A relationship has a much better chance of being happy and lasting long term if both parties’ relationships needs are being met. If your needs aren't being met then there is a much higher chance that the relationship won’t last. If your relationship has ended and you are trying to get back together and make it work, it is important to work on having relationships needs met for both partners.
To be able to get your needs met your partner must know what your needs are. They cannot try to meet your needs if they have no idea what they are. Good communication is essential for a happy relationship. Your partner will want to meet your needs but you must tell them what they are so they can do so.
Just as you need to tell your partner what your relationships needs are you also need to encourage your partner to tell you what their needs are. If you have never asked your partner about his needs before you may actually be surprised by what their needs are.
If you have the need to be told by your partner that they love you and you like to be told this often then you might assume that they have the same need. You may tell them often that you love them but in actual fact they may not have that need at all. I'm sure he enjoys being told that you love him but it might not be his need and his needs may be completely different and still not being met. Perhaps he prefers to be shown that you love him rather than being told.
A relationship can really be strengthened just by having this simple discussion and talking about your needs. You will find it so much easier to make each other happy when you know what the other person wants. You may feel a little uncomfortable talking about your needs but you should try to do it anyway, it really can help improve your relationship.
Your needs may be that you need your partner to help around the house a little more. Maybe you wish that he would help vacuum or tidy up but you don't like to ask for his help so you do it on your own. You may begin to feel some resentment toward him for not helping when in actual fact he has no idea that you would like his help around the house. It is very simple to ask for his help and he may be quite willing to do it. There is no point getting angry with him for not helping out or meeting your needs if you have never told him what your needs are.
If you stomp around vacuuming or slamming things around as you are tidying up then you are using passive aggressive behavior which is very common in relationships. Many people use this type of behavior when they become angry that their needs aren't being met when in actual fact it wouldn't be necessary if they just talked about their needs.
Talking about your needs instead of using passive aggressive behavior will make the relationship a much happier one and you won't be so angry and resentful.
If you use passive aggressive behavior he will just think you are acting like a spoilt brat and will only feel guilted into helping. If you talk to him and explain your needs then he will be much happier to help you.
Your needs could be varied and are not restricted to housework, it could be showing affection or feeling respected. People have many needs and you really should discuss your relationships needs to have a long and happy relationship.
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