Whether you think it's right or wrong, the truth is that some people are born to be attracted to members of their own sex. It happens in the wild with many species of animals and it happens with humans. Today more of these same sex couples are entering into marriage. The question many people are asking is what are the same sex marriage and family dynamics?
Well, the truth is it's pretty much the same as a heterosexual couples family dynamics. There was a recent movie that portrayed a lesbian couple raising two children. It was interesting because they were a totally "normal" family. They dealt with the same issues, the same worries and problems that any family has to deal with.
In this movie the sperm donor makes a sudden appearance back in their lives and the kids want to meet him. When they do it threatens the moms. But, that is just like any situation where a child has been raised by a non biological parent and the other parent suddenly shows up.
If you take away the fact that the married couple were two women, the movie just showed family life like it is lived out all over this country. There are many instances of one parent not being up to the task, only to reappear years later when the kids are grown. The confusion, the resentments and the same sex marriage and family dynamics are no different than that of any other family.
We all have the roles we play in all of our relationships. We take a certain role in our work life, we take on a certain role in our family and with our parents and we take on a certain role in our home life. That is based more on our personality and that of our spouse than our sexual orientation.
The dynamics of the family will vary and ebb and flow based on what outside pressures are being applied. Whether it is a same sex marriage or a heterosexual marriage, problems can and do arise.
A layoff and subsequent loss of income is an enormous stressor and can really set the normal family dynamic on it's ear. There are so many other things that can and do happen to families of all types heterosexual, homosexual, single parent, grandparent led, etc.
Even something as simple and normal as the kids getting older and the issues they face can cause a ripple in the dynamics of the family. Dealing with issues your kid may face such as drug use, sexual behaviors, bullying, depression, etc. All of these things affect the normal family dynamic no matter what type of family it is.
There are some who would like to find fault with, or try to say that the
same sex marriage and family dynamics are wrong or abnormal. The truth is that there never really was a "normal" family dynamic. Many people cling to the "values" of the 50's but in reality there weren't a lot of values then.
In those days a man could beat his wife and as long as he didn't kill her it was ok. Women were really out of luck if their husband was abusive, divorce was virtually unheard of and even if she did get away, she would have a hard time finding a job and supporting herself. Her boss could could blatantly harass her sexually and she had no protection. Some family values, huh?
The fact of the matter is that the good old days weren't really all that good for many in our society. If the marriages of today, whether same sex or not, are more about love, companionship and partnerships, than control or abuse, than I would say that the same sex marriage and family dynamics are just fine.
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